I always thought I would be a busy bee…a hard working fulltime employee…balancing family and job. Yes, I do know how naive that now sounds. I struggled for well over a year with how to balance my desire to be at home. That being said, I still think that I probably do a better job of balancing family/job vs. being at home full time. That has never been my fulltime job, but I have definitely seen signs of stress in our family when I was at home after being laid off. It was certainly a very stressful time, and we dealt with the stress of interviewing, job hunting, moving, commuting, and starting new jobs during that time. I admittedly had a much shorter fuse than if those things were not factors.
I think if I stayed at home I would also have a very different perspective. I would do things a lot differently as far as routine and responsibilities if my job was to take care of our children and home fulltime. However, I think I would still not be a “typical” stay at home mom. I do not mean that in a derogatory or condescending manner in any way whatsoever. What I mean is that I think I would struggle with the isolation and being with little ones 24 hours a day…with no sick days and little vacation. I don’t think I would have the right mind frame. Maybe that is only because I have not worn those shoes, but cleaning my house is just not always a high priority. Sure, I would love for it to be much cleaner and have more time to clean regularly, but I still don’t think I would sweep daily or mop every other day. Again, I don’t mean anything controversial. I know that there are much more important things to staying at home than cleaning and I know the home is not always spotless (maybe even dirtier) if mom stays at home with toddlers in particular.
I think in a very small way it helps me to think that maybe working moms are wired differently. Maybe we have to be. Maybe God did give me a different heart than to focus on my home. Maybe I would be the best stay at home mom ever…with a dirty house. Whatever the reason, I know that God has called me to serve Him while I work outside of our home. Sure, there is a pretty big financial need for me to work, but knowing that God has me where He wants me keeps me from focusing on unhappiness and blaming our finances. I try to focus on the fact that God has given me a different skill set. Instead of thinking I work because I have to, I am going to focus on all of the ways that He has made me different and the gifts He has given me as a working mom.
What do you think? Do you think you are wired differently or is it by choice? Has God gifted you to be a working mom?